Professor Bainbridge...on law, politics, religion, culture & food

Amen.

You do not like McCain the Man?

I do not like him, Joe-I-am.

Could you like him, with a goat?

I would not, could not, with a goat!

Could you like him, on a boat?

I could not, would not, on a boat.
I will not, will not, with a goat.
I will not like him in the rain.
I will not like him on a train.
Not in the dark! Not in a tree!
Not in a car! You let me be!
I will not like him in a box.
I will not like him with a fox.
I will not like him in a house.
I do not like them with a mouse.
I do not like him here or there.
I do not like him ANYWHERE!
I do not like McCain the Man!
I do not like him, Joe-I-am.

You do not like him.
So you say.
Consider the alternative.
And you may.
Consider Hillary and you may, I say.

Joe!
If you will let me be, I will consider him.
You will see.

[at which point in our story, the heretofore tormented conservative hero cautiously considers McCain as the GOP nominee]

Say!
I like McCain the Man!
I do! I like him, Joe-I-am!
And I would vote for him in a boat.
And I would vote for him with a goat…
And I will vote for him in the rain.
And in the dark. And on a train.
And in a car. And in a tree.
John is so good, so good, you see!
So I will vote for him in a box.
And I will vote for him with a fox.
And I will vote for him in a house.
And I will vote for him with a mouse.
And I will support him here and there.
Say! I will vote for him ANYWHERE!

I do so like
McCain the Man!
Thank you!
Thank you,
Joe-I-am!