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Dave Barry Disses NH and Iowa

I’ve caught a lot of grief over the years for suggesting that New Hampshire and Iowa don’t deserve to have a death grip on the Presidential nomination process. Dave Barry goes to town on the same theme:

… let’s take a moment to look back on both the Iowa caucuses and the New Hampshire primaries, and ask ourselves if these two non-representative states—which have, between them, roughly the same total minority population as Gladys Knight and the Pips—should play such a huge role in selecting our presidential nominees. This is a very complex issue, with many strong arguments on both sides.

No, sorry, correction: It’s actually a simple issue. The Iowa/New Hampshire system is insane. It’s like a 50-table restaurant with a big, varied menu, except that only two tables are allowed to order. If these two tables order clams, for example, or Michael Dukakis, that’s what gets served to all the other tables.

But at this point I don’t think there’s anything the rest of the states can do about it. Iowa and New Hampshire will do anything to be first. You populous states can’t beat them, because they want it more than you do. They’re like the people who camp out for two weeks so they can be in front of the line to buy tickets for a hot concert, except that instead of a hot concert, it’s a chance to shake hands with Duncan Hunter six different times. Tough luck, residents of populous states! At least you don’t have to deal with the snowbank signs.

HT: Taylor